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Monday, August 1, 2016

Mon 07:07:27 PM EDT Aug 1 heather{JT} . . . So, if one half of a D/s couple experiences something - illness, loss, loss of employment, depression, etc.. something that takes over their so to speak and although they still feel submissive or dominant, they're unable to really put 'effort' into keeping it at the forefront of the relationship..

what are some ways you think the other partner can retain their own grounding in a D/s sense until the other is capable of being 'on' again?

What small (or big) things do we as D/s couples do every day in our every day relationship life..that we may forget are even part of our power exchanges..that we can focus on.. take heart in ..etc... what can we do.. to keep that lovely 'tension' of the p/e even in times of extreme stress?

Mon 07:07:43 PM EDT Aug 1 heather{JT} . . .
~ there ya go, peeps ~ have at it!

Mon 10:13:31 PM EDT Aug 1 little ella . . . *thinking lots..* some things that come to mind for me when it comes to things done every day that may be overseen through time as being part of our power exchanges... my daily mail to Daddy, irrespective of what's going on, it's been a constant thing.. something that has become a bedtime routine but is really my surrender of the days thoughts.. stories.. questions...
another thing is my secret messages for Him that i leave in various parts of the castle.. it's not a set task, but a habit that has evolved into a need to scatter my freshest proclamations in hidden spaces after He has left me..
*nibbling my lips a bit..* there's Him watching me... always.. every day.. in different ways and to different degrees.. no matter what is going on for either of us.. He watches me... that's not something i forget is part of D/s for me, but rather something that has themed my relationship with Daddy and so has become a kind of.. background type thing.. *scrunching my nose..* i don't know how to explain it.. but yeah..
i think it's important to have little things to sink into when life gets a hold of one or the other in a way that affects the dynamic... to find patience and gratitude and empathy and strength in the symbols of what makes the two unique and for each other.. that's my two cents. *littke grin and outs*

Mon 10:41:30 PM EDT Aug 1 ~~Dark Velvet . . . hummm... If only I knew the correct answer to that question.

Being patient and supportive didn't seem to work when I tried that. Staying in touch even when replies were few and far between didn't seem to work. Looking for replies 20 times a day. In the end, in My case I learned the hard way that One found a new path with others seemed to fill the need the stress opened up in rt. Something I apparently couldn't fill no matter how hard I tried. Only wish I had been informed My surrender and devoted submission was no longer needed.
Id have done more, anything even, if only I had known.

Mon 10:52:44 PM EDT Aug 1 aisie lynn . . . *peering in, reading over the topic and contemplating it for some time before speaking, her voice soft*
For me, some ways that i retain my own grounding when life stresses begin to overwhelm either Glory or myself have been to listen to the music that He has shared with me and i with Him.... i make sure to peek into another location whenever i am able and leave Him little notes.... i also make little things in rt that remind me of Him... of His Ownership of me... and i make sure to share pictures of them with Him so that He knows He is in my thoughts.... there are so many little things that are harder to explain....

As for when my own rt stressors seem to overwhelm me and begin to make it difficult for me to be as available to spend time with Him in O.our relationship, then i lean on those same things.... O.our music... leaving little notes for Him... sharing what is going on in my rt with Him so that He knows what is happening and why i am not around as much as either of U.us would like.... overall, i try to stay in contact with Him as much as i possibly can... even if it is simply through little notes or sending positive thoughts His way... *warm smile*

Mon 11:16:32 PM EDT Aug 1 heather{JT} . . . ~checks and smiles~ Thank you all for contributing..*ws*..

For me.. were it me as the submissive who was having to understand something that was making it difficult for Daddy to dominate me in the way to which I have become accustomed... well, one, I think that I would have to rely on ritual..and also..making the extra effort "for us" and also belief in my own submission..to Him..

In ritual it could be how I greet Him coming home from work.. removing His boots, clothes...in meals..whether out or in..waiting until He's had His first bite.. or here..waiting until He's given me leave to chat freely before speaking when He has come in the room.. Other ways might include walking a step behind while out or catching a certain look or signal in a social gathering.. seeing to His comforts..etc.. Things we might end up taking for granted or even stop recognizing as part of the 'power exchange' I would try and renew my zest in..

Mon 11:19:25 PM EDT Aug 1 heather{JT} . . . I think wherever we are.. no matter the amount of stress either of us is under..I try very hard to maintain..myself...I try to never go over the line..even if it's me who is in the worst mood...

I also think..in times of deep stress.. if I'm feeling out of sorts.. I try to communicate to Him.. that I need more.. a reminder.. whether it's play.. or it's just seeing Him make effort.. with my well-being as the priority..even for a moment..

Mon 11:20:44 PM EDT Aug 1 ~~Dark Velvet . . . Its kind of hard to do those kind of things when you do't know the places One is visiting.

Mon 11:24:13 PM EDT Aug 1 heather{JT} . . . Like any relationship..D/s or not.. it needs to be nurtured from both sides.... I don't think any couple could survive long lengths of time where only one half is trying to keep it going.. I think if anyone felt that they were losing 'who' they are.. it would be time for a heartfelt yet serious evaluation..

I think all that's been said regarding the little notes, etc..music.. is good.. all things.. even the bitty things we think aren't so consequential...really are....... and truly anything worth having is worth digging in and riding out the storm... sometimes you just need an extra dose of self-reliance..when things get topsy~turvy...but also..a partner..who even in the midst of the storms..will hear your call..recognize your efforts.. stand with you..even when battling 'life'..

Mon 11:26:18 PM EDT Aug 1 ~~Dark Velvet . . . I applaud all the efforts mentioned... *lil smile*

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